Many people ask me how to preserve an identity for our children. My answer starts with a question: What do you want to bring into your home? Whatever you bring in will shape your children's identity.
Every Hanukkah, I think about the story of Grandpa Hanukkah.
When my children were little, they saw Santa around them—running around and giving out gifts. I wanted to bring that same joy into our home, while also helping them feel connected to the wider, non-Jewish world. But I wanted to make it meaningful for us.
So, I created Grandpa Hanukkah. He would bring gifts to the children every Hanukkah, just like Santa does.
Years later, my youngest—no longer so little—was asked in her Hebrew class to list words related to Hanukkah. Naturally, she said, “Grandpa Hanukkah.” Her classmates looked at her in confusion, and she turned to me, asking, “Does no one know who he is?”
That’s how traditions are born. For her, Grandpa Hanukkah was so real, so tangible, that it never occurred to her that he wasn’t part of everyone’s celebration.
What traditions have you created in your family?
On this occasion, I wish everyone a Happy Hanukkah!
Dr. Efrat Tzadik
Expert in Immigration, Integration, and Identity
Certified Trauma Coach, CBT
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